Pseudo Resident’s Illegal Stay in Another World

༺ Visiting The Patient and Hassan’s Club (2) ༻

My mind went blank at those words.

“Are you saying that the Goddess Juno’s Holy Warrior, or whatever in hell that bastard is called, will target me?”

“Yes, that punk always picks a fight with strong warriors. There are more than dozens of warriors who died in that devil’s hands.”

“Damn it…! Miss Hippolyte, don’t you know very well that I’m not that strong? And yet you are still saying that the punk will target me?”

“Hassan, if you want me to be frank with you, then yes, it is true that there are many adventurers who are stronger than you. However, there is no Samaritan as famous as you in this city. The Good Samaritan— it’s a popular ballad about you that is spreading throughout the slums right now.”

If it was a ballad, then it was some kind of song that contained a story or short tale within it. It was a song that minstrels and bards sang to people in exchange for coins as donations for their lyrical storytelling. However, “The Good Samaritan” was a title I had never heard of before today.

“…What song is that?”

“They said that it was a story about how you saved the bard called Marco. When that stupid bard was about to be stoned to death, you showed up and spoke something, right? You said that only the truly innocent and pure were qualified to throw a stone at that fellow.”

Damn it! That story did remind me of something. However, what I said before was in a totally different sense from what was being conveyed here. I clearly said that everyone could throw stones at him.

How could that event turn into a different story altogether like this?

“Uh, what I said was—”

“Only the truly innocent and pure can throw stones at others. It’s a wise answer that I never thought would have come out of the mouths of such a heartless Samaritan as you. In the end, it gained immense popularity in the public.”

Damn you, Marco! I didn’t know where he was or what he was doing now, but I might have to teach him a lesson when I run into him on the streets later.

“You look like you didn’t know anything about this at all. Then you also don’t know the song about the witch Nemea’s lion?”

“…I’ve never heard of it before.”

“How about the dance of the crocodile and the warrior?”

“Holy shit! Just what the hell is that again…?”

“Hmph, whatever. Whenever there is a slightly famous adventurer, there will be a bard following along to preach and spread his achievements. And as the stories circulate from their mouths and the support from the citizens is added into the mix, it will help the adventurer to go up the ranks to reach the gold tier at a faster rate.”

The word “gold tier” reminded me of the image of a gold necklace jingling before me.

For me, who was forcibly brought into this world, the necklace I wanted to obtain was worth nothing less than what a ticket to return to my original world would.

If the fictitious songs and rumors that Marco was spreading could greatly help my reputation which would in turn enhance my chances of being promoted to a gold-tier adventurer then that’s not a bad thing, right?

Hippolyte spoke again in the meantime.

“Anyways, the more your rumors spread, the sooner they will reach that troublesome Holy Warrior’s ears; especially since the rascal is known for not holding back against fellow Samaritans, and I’ve even heard that the fellow was exiled from the lands of Samaria because of it.”

My attention was drawn from the song that Marco was spreading about me back to the barbarian Hippolyte was talking about— the Holy Warrior of Juno.

So, the more famous I became, the more likely it was for me to be targeted by the barbaric human hunter, right? Damn! That was so fucking scary!

“Are you scared? You said you wanted to be a gold-tier adventurer right, Hassan?”

“I know…”

“Perhaps, the reason you want to become a gold-tier adventurer is Knoxdotty?”

“Uh, what? T-That’s—”

Did I ever tell Hippolyte I wanted to become a gold-tier adventurer because of Luna? No, even though I had a bit of a hazy memory these days, I didn’t remember saying anything like that to her.

Damn it! How did she know?

“I can already tell from that shocked look on your face that I hit the bullseye. Adventurers who reach the gold tier are given the right to take a woman with a vow of chastity as their legal spouse. You must be aiming for that, right?”

“Wow, there really was something convenient like that?”

I never knew a gold-tier adventurer had such a right.

Originally, gold-tier adventurers were so rare in the city that there were hardly one or two, and it was almost impossible to even get the chance to see them.

In this world without the presence of the Internet, it was no wonder that I was in the dark about such matters.

Anyways, that was why Luna and Knox told me to at least be a gold-tier adventurer to marry her, huh…

As I was lost in coming to my own conclusions about this matter, Hippolyte, looking down at me, suddenly spoke out.

“I can tell that the feelings between you and Knoxdotty are not ordinary. So I ask you this, have you already committed a crime?”

“C-Crime? What crime?”

“What else? Uh, I-I am talking about that very obscene and profane act between members of the opposite sex. If you’ve already crossed the line, I’ll have to immediately cut your neck as the head of the maiden group.”

Damn it! What did you mean by you’re gonna have to cut my throat, huh? I would like to think of it as a joke, but as far as I know, Hippolyte was not the type to joke around. In many ways, she was the sternest woman I knew.

Therefore, I had to rack my brains to desperately find an excuse so that I can prevent my neck from being severed by this crazy woman.

“How could that be!? Even though I’m an uneducated barbarian, I have never gone that far!”

“Your lips may utter such words, but your muscles can not lie.”

Slide—

Hippolyte’s slender fingers crossed the blanket covering my naked upper body and were now touching my abdomen. This woman was a monster with a ferocious ability to recognize lies by looking at how someone’s muscles moved.

So I couldn’t help but become frightened.

“I-It’s true!”

Hippolyte’s slender fingers pressed down on my abdomen, sides, and chest as I tried my best to make an excuse filled with all the sincerity I could muster.

“Ughhh!”

I was already suffering from so much muscle pain that I couldn’t even move my body, and now, with her pressing her fingers on top of it, my body started hurting so much that I thought I was going to cry any second now.

“Gasp!”

“Hmm… What an absurd bodily injury. All right, obviously, you can’t move at this rate.”

After pressing hard on my body for some time, Hippolyte’s fingers suddenly stopped. Soon, the broad and firm surface of her palms began to gently stroke the muscles all over my body.

“W-What are you doing?”

“It’s hard to grasp the truth by looking at these injured muscles. Hold still.”

Slide— Sliiiide— Press—

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh—”

After suffering from muscle pain in every corner of my body, when I suddenly felt the soft touch of a woman, it felt like my body was about to completely melt down.

It was actually hard to explain if this was really effective or not without knowing how bad my muscle injury was and where to press to revitalize it. So, I was practically in the dark about this matter even though I was knowledgeable in terms of massages.

“Ughhhhh—”

“W-Wait, I am finding this position quite uncomfortable.”

She found it awkward to sit next to me while she was massaging my body so she decided to change postures. Soon, she came and sat near my lower body.

Then, she stretched out her hands and intensively massaged the thoracic muscle on the side of my armpit.

Press— Press—

The area where she applied pressure to felt extremely painful, but for some reason, it also made me feel ticklish and refreshed in some parts of that area, which almost made me lose my mind from the pleasure and relief I was feeling right now.

Chill—

I felt so good that I got goosebumps all over my body. Moreover, the massage seemed really effective, so I started to gain back my lost vitality.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve seen someone with such a heavily-injured body. Since your condition is this bad, isn’t it better to visit the healing center?”

“Well, isn’t the healing center expensive?”

“Well, this kind of injury will cost you about 60 silvers.”

Damn it! 60 silvers were even more than the amount of money I had on me. There was no way I could go there to be treated.

“Uwaaahhh—”

“Anyways, can you just not make that sound?”

“Uh, that’s, it’s, a strange feeling! I can’t stand it argh, I can’t—”

“I-I see, I understand. Before I became a warrior, I was also serving as a priestess of Mars. The priestesses of Mars are able to infuse energy into the body of others by touching the skin like this…”

There was no way for me to know whether what Hippolyte was saying was real or not… as I was currently feeling so strange that I was about to completely lose it.

However, I couldn’t completely let myself go now.

As I felt that blood started to gradually rush toward my lower body at an alarming rate.

The warmth of Hippolyte’s soft yet sturdy hips, sitting near my pelvis, vividly seeped through my pants, and it was nothing short of a feeling to die for.

Of course, she might really kill me if my schlong stood erect in a situation like this. What the hell should I do now?

Slide— Slide—

“It’s quite uncomfortable to sit in this position too. Samaritan, do you not even have the talent to be a seat?”

At that moment, Hippolyte slowly moved her waist as if the current posture was also quite awkward for her, and started to lower her body. As a result, my lower body started rubbing against her soft thighs and buttocks, and I couldn’t help but get aroused due to these sensations.

Erect—

Hippolyte suddenly stopped her massage out of the blue.

Jolt— Jolt—

My schlong which was directly positioned underneath her hips rose high as if it was protesting against the world. It was so close to tearing through my pants that it wasn’t even funny anymore.

Fuck!

Now I was dead for sure.

It was such a ridiculous thing to lose my life like this when I even survived a duel to death against a great shaman like Somnia.

Unlike my lower body which grew harder and hotter with each second, my head gradually grew cold as it sensed the ensuing aura of death.

“…How did it become so hard?”

Sitting above my hard schlong, Hippolyte spoke in a low voice that came out more like a small growl. I couldn’t bear to look into her eyes as she stared down at me as if nailing me with those cold eyes of hers.

“Uh, when a beautiful woman touches me like that… it is natural that my little brother down there would have a reaction like that—!”

“B-Beautiful woman!?”

Hippolyte was startled, and her shoulders shook. It felt like she had heard something really embarrassing, enough to make her lose her speech. At that moment, I, too, regretted the embarrassing as hell words that came out of my lips.

Damn it!

But could anything be more embarrassing than having a hard-on in front of a woman and being discovered by her on top of that? I was truly feeling quite desperate right now. Desperate enough to let those words leak out of my mouth,

After a brief moment of silence…

Exaggerated dry coughs leaked out of Hippolyte’s mouth followed by her voice as she spoke.

“Ahem, well, uh, then there’s nothing we can do about it. But Samaritan, I am a warrior of Mars before I am a woman. It’s a little unpleasant to be called a beautiful woman like you did just now.”

“I-I’m sorry—”

That was the end of the conversation between Hippolyte and me. It was terrible to have such a sudden bout of silence, even though the atmosphere between us was quite awkward, to begin with.

Where the hell did Luna go and why was she not coming back yet? I wanted her to come quickly because Hippolyte was especially weak against Luna.

“…Samaritan, I’m asking you just in case, but do you really think that I’m a beautiful woman?”

“W-what, yes, of course, you are—!”

I wholeheartedly answered her question with utmost sincerity.

Stealthy—

Suddenly, her palm was gently placed on the left side of my chest. Strangely, her palm was smooth with no calluses, even though she had lived her whole life fighting and struggling as an adventurer.

She closed her mouth as if she sensed something with her hands that was placed on my chest.

“Well, well, Samaritan. As expected, you have no talent for lying as well. I should punish you indeed. Now get up.”

“I-I can’t move my body—”

“You whine a lot, unlike what your physique may indicate. Hurry up, put some strength on your body.”

Hippolyte sat up from my abdomen near the epigastric region. As her weight disappeared, I felt significantly lighter. So I tried to put some strength into my waist just in case.

“Oof.”

Although I didn’t expect much, surprisingly, as if my previous harrowing condition had been a lie, I was suddenly able to move my body. I had not been able to move since yesterday but now I was able to do it just fine. Of course, my muscles still hurt like hell and my joints creaked and groaned.

However, there was a huge difference between being able to move my body and not.

Fuck! I was finally able to scratch the itch on my back!

Scratch— Scratch—

I thought I was going to die from the itchiness I was constantly feeling. Ahh! It felt so fucking good. I thanked Hippolyte in my mind for this refreshing feeling.

“I guess you really have a talent for massages. I don’t know how to thank you for this.”

“I won’t be fooled by your flattering words anymore. As a warrior, actions speak louder than words.”

After letting out a snort, Hippolyte sat next to me. Then she turned around, revealing her smooth neck and back.

“There’s no reason you can’t pay me back if you want to. You can just pay me back by massaging my body as I did yours.”

“Are you asking me to give you a massage?”

“Yes, even if your hands are useless, you can still use them into doing something helpful.”

Hippolyte flicked her tied hair forward with her hand.

Due to that, I was now able to see her slender neck, healthy prominent scapula, ramrod straight spinal cord, and toned erector muscles at a glance.

I had already thought about this before, but her body was so well-proportioned and healthy that it could be used as a human anatomy model.

Anyways, I was highly motivated because, thanks to Hippolyte, I was now able to move my body even if by a little. Also, I remembered her criticizing me for giving her a lousy massage the last time.

I clenched my fists and spoke modestly.

“Then, let me try out my skills, no matter how lacking they may be.”

“All-rriggght—!?”

Hippolyte failed to answer correctly, and her voice was suddenly out of tune.

The reason was that my clenched fists tightly pressed down on one of her pressure points— the Baliao point. That pressure point was located in the part where her pelvis and buttocks touched.

Not only did I press down with a firm pressure, but I also started vibrating my fist; almost like a massaging tool.

Buzz— Buzz— Buzz—

Hippolyte probably got surprised by my vibrating motions since she hadn’t experienced the advantages of civilization as I did. Also, this massage technique could effectively stimulate the Baliao point.

The Baliao point referred to the eight acupoints near the tailbone, which was very effective in treating women’s diseases, including reproductive problems.

I thought this place would be the most effective since Hippolyte seemed to suffer from period pain, such as menstrual cramps.

“Ouch, ow!”

However, as I had not been careful with my fists I seemed to have stimulated the area recklessly, causing Hippolyte to shudder and writhe in pain.

She seemed to have a lot of muscle mass and a sturdy frame, so I pressed down with a rather strong force using my fist, but had I failed to control my strength there?

“Um, a-are you okay? Did I press too hard?”

“N-no, it’s fine. Your fists are so weak that they can’t hurt me at all—!”

Whether she was pretending or if she was genuinely okay was something I was not able to tell, but Hippolyte’s reply had been quite optimistic.

So this time, I only placed my thumbs vertically on top of her back and firmly pressed the Shenshu point near her Levator Ani muscles with a fairly soft touch.

I pressed on the Shenshu acupoint once again with my thumbs. It was located near the kidneys.

It was a good spot to massage for women.

As I pressed down firmly, Hippolyte’s tense muscles, which had been stiffening since the start, began to loosen up as if they were melting away, and she eventually broke out of her stiff posture.

“Huaaahh, ughhh—”

Hippolyte just lay on the floor, trembling and shuddering intermittently.

“Heuh…ugh….”

I was surprised and amazed to learn that she was able to make such delicate and soft breathing sounds. It was very feminine of her to do that and went against her strong and sturdy build and persona.

Perhaps that was why blood rushed to my lower body, and my manhood became painfully erect.

“Are you okay?”

“O-Of course I-I’m fine, it’s just that… with your soft hands, it’s not quite refreshing enough…! I-I think that’s enough for now—”

“If my hands are not to your satisfaction, I’ll try using a tool instead.”

I stood up and picked up the club I had put in the back corner. Since this was a thick and sturdy living weapon, I was sure that even Hippolyte would be satisfied by it.

“U-Ughh—”

Because of that, for a moment, I saw fear spreading in the eyes of this female warrior, who seemingly didn’t know what fear even was.