How To Survive as a Villain

When Chen Ge woke up again, he was awakened by a round of cheering. His eyes were full of sparks as he asked: “Huh? What happened?”

Someone shouted in his ear: “The front line has won!! The army is already stationed there! We’ll leave tomorrow and follow the troops there!”

“Oh!” After cheering for a while, Chen Ge turned his head around to look for someone, and when he didn’t find that person, he asked: “Hey, where’s Physician Xiao?”

Someone replied: “I don’t know why, but as soon as His Majesty won the battle, he rushed back overnight, leaving a few Generals stationed at the front line. Just now, Physician Xiao asked if His Majesty was injured; after that, he hurriedly went to find His Majesty.”

Deputy General Chen, who was a single person by nature, sneered: “My heart is so lonely, it’s really fucking sour.”

…

Yan HeQing’s shoulder was cut by a sharp blade, even though it had already been bandaged, Xiao YuAn disliked the roughness of the bandage and was currently reapplying medicine on him. Xiao YuAn brought a basin with clean water, carefully wiping away the dry blood and sticky dirt from Yan HeQing’s wound: “Does it hurt?”

Yan HeQing slightly lowered his head to look at the person in front of him, unwilling to look away: “It doesn’t hurt.”

Xiao YuAn replied with a smile: “I can’t help you if it hurts, so you have to bear with it.”

Yan HeQing: “I know a way to stop the pain.”

Xiao YuAn: “Oh? You mean a compress with herbal medicine to stop the pain? The effect of that method is not that good. I applied it to Chen Ge before, but he still kept on squealing like a pig.”

Yan HeQing shook his head: “No.”

Xiao YuAn: “Then what else can I do?”

Yan HeQing slightly leaned over and whispered in Xiao YuAn’s ear with a soft seductive voice: “If you kiss me, it won’t hurt anymore.”

Xiao YuAn: “….. You, y-you don’t flirt with me. I-I’ll tell you how to apply h-herbal medicine, wa-wait. I, m-my hand is trembling, you have to pr-press it into the wound, the-then i-it wo-won’t hurt anymore.”

The corners of Yan HeQing’s mouth raised slightly: “You do it, you’re responsible for stopping the pain.”

‘Why is this phrase so similar to ‘you stirred up the fire, you have to extinguish it yourself’?’

‘So you showed me that you decided to be a considerate and protective man, but you secretly decided to become a Tyrannical President?’

Xiao YuAn didn’t reply to him, he just lowered his head and proceeded to clean Yan HeQing’s wound. Then he applied the medicine, bandaged it with clean cloth, and half supported Yan HeQing’s shoulder, then gently kissed his wound.

The candlelight in the tent was flickering slightly, making their shadows move. Somehow, these shaking shadows were reflected into the bottom of his eyes, making his eyes become extremely deep and dark.

As soon as Xiao YuAn raised his head, his chin was pinched by Yan HeQing’s hand, who also tightly wrapped his other hand around Xiao YuAn’s waist, as he raised his chin up. Xiao YuAn’s eyes gradually widened until he ended up closing them the moment he thought he would be kissed.

“I’ve come to report!!!” A soldier outside the tent suddenly lifted the curtain and ran inside, then he proceeded to kneel down with one fist clasping his knee. When he saw the situation inside the tent, the overbearing soldier instantly turned shy: “I-I’ve co-come to re-re-report Ge-general Hu-huang, he, he, he, he asked to see His Majesty.”

Xiao YuAn: “……”

Yan HeQing: “……”

The soldier’s hands were shaking, his legs were shaking, his internal organs were shaking. He has lived for 35 years and reported news for seven years now. But, for fuck’s sake! He has never! Seen! A situation like this!

What should he do? Would it be useful to hit his own Tiangling acupuncture point¹ and then pretend to faint?

Xiao YuAn coughed lightly and with a small voice he said: “Yan, Yan-ge can you re-remove your ha-hand?”

Yan HeQing let go of Xiao YuAn’s chin and wrapped his arms around his waist instead. Then he turned his head to look at the reporting soldier and said: “Let the General know that he can come in.”

The soldier’s voice trembled as he replied a small ‘yes’, and then he ran out of the tent in the blink of an eye.

As soon as the soldier ran out of the tent, Yan HeQing quickly turned his head around, looking at the corner of Xiao YuAn’s mouth, who had not yet reacted, and kissed him before he had to reluctantly release him.

Shy XYA is so cuteeeee (๑ˊ͈ ॢꇴ ˋ͈)〜♡॰ॱ he was totally looking forward to that that kiss before the soldier interrupted them hahahahaha

And YHQ is so shameless lmao! (∩˃o˂∩)

Footnotes

1. 天灵穴 tiān líng xué; Is the name of an acupuncture point located at the chest.