Deathworld Commando: Reborn

Chapter 9 Ch.5- Reconciliation.

I slowly opened my eyes, expecting to see the deep expanse of the void. Instead, I was laying down staring up at a familiar ceiling. My body felt weak and tired, but that was a good thing I guess. That means I must have survived. And I could fulfill my promise.

My neck felt like it weighed double its usual amount as I managed to rotate it. Old man Jacobs was sitting in a chair pulled up to my bedside and was dozing off. But as soon I gazed in his direction, though it was only a moment, his eyes snapped open, and we stared right at each other in silence. I could tell he hadn’t slept very much. His normal amount of bags had extra bags under those emerald eyes of his. I thought he looked ancient before, but he somehow managed to look even older now. Guess that was my fault as well.

“Finally awake, kid. That’s good,” Dr. Jacobs said softly. His usual demeanor was replaced with a warmth that radiated from him.

I tried to speak, but I only managed a weak moan.

“Relax, don’t push yourself,” he said softly. Dr. Jacobs summoned a fist-sized ball of water and guided it towards my mouth, "Here you go, kid."

I eagerly awaited its bliss as it splashed into my mouth, the water coated my dry throat, and it was even chilled a bit. But I needed more. I reopened my mouth, signaling for another round, and Dr. Jacobs obliged with a chuckle.

“Thank you… Doctor, you probably saved me too. I’m sorry,” I said sincerely.

“It’s fine. You got lucky I decided to go out there with your parents. You wouldn’t have survived without me. Poison from a Shadowling, broken bones galore, blood loss, and mana sickness to top it all off. You are a really lucky kid,” reprimanded Dr. Jacobs.

“I’m sorry.” It was all I could say in this situation. I didn’t know what I should say.

This man had gone out there and risked himself to save me for nothing. I couldn’t offer him anything else other than my sincerest apology. I owed him so much. He was my mentor and asked nothing of me in return. Dr. Jacobs spent countless hours teaching me about mana and magic, an education fit for the elite.

Additionally, he healed my wounded and battered body regularly with barely any complaints. What could I even do for him? What did this man even need or want from a failure like me? But maybe… I could do this.

No, I wanted to do this. Perhaps it was selfish of me to want this, but it's all I could think of.

“Hey… Dr. Jacobs. Can I maybe call you Grandpa, if that’s okay?” I asked.

My voice shook a bit more than I intended. I was expecting him to just laugh at me and say, “For someone so smart, you sure are stupid, boy,” or something along those lines. I didn't know why but I wanted to recognize him as family. At this point, he was far more than some mentor to me. His facial features softened even more.

He gave me a warm smile that reached ear to ear. “Sure, kid. If that’s what you want,” my grandpa said.

“Thank you, Grandpa. For everything, I really am sorry.”

I was a little surprised he was so willing to accept me. He didn't even ask why or anything. It made me happy that he was willing to accept me as family.

“Mmm. Don’t worry about it. Nobody could have known a Shadowling pack would come so close to us. The wards around the village are supposed to protect us. Normally we get an early warning. But this time, you being attacked was the early warning. It was completely random that so many monsters showed up. It’s incredibly rare,” explained Grandpa.

I could only manage a slight nod as he continued, “But it’s fine. I guess in some twisted way, you might have saved some people, kid. We have no idea how so many got past the rangers, hunters, and the village wards. Those monsters probably would have come after the village if they didn’t stumble upon you first.”

“Did anybody get hurt?” I asked.

“Nope. You were the only one who had anything serious. As soon as your parents knew you would be okay, they and all the rangers and hunters went into the jungle for two whole days. They hunted every monster or dangerous animal all the way to the next damn village. I almost feel bad for anything that got caught up in their warpath…”

“And where are my parents now?” I asked nervously.

I had so much to say to them. My chest tightened as I thought about what I was going to say. I had made myself a promise. I was going to change, and I was going to be the best son I could be. But more importantly, I wanted to tell them, no, I needed to tell my mom and dad that I loved them.

“They finally just went to sleep. You Elves don’t need to sleep as much as us Humans. But staying up for three days straight is bad for anyone. So I finally convinced them that I’d watch you for a bit longer if they just got some sleep.”

“I see,” I said a little dejectedly.

My parents spent three whole sleepless days slaughtering monsters in retribution for me, then even came home and tried to wait for me to wake up. A ball formed in the back of my throat as my fatigue seeped deeper into my body.

I must keep my promise this time.

“You know you are pretty tough. I didn’t think you would wake up so soon. But you need more rest, so go back to sleep, Son.”

Grandpa’s soothing voice lulled me back to sleep as I could no longer fight against the fatigue.

—

Seana Shadowheart’s POVNôv(el)B\\jnn

I might be the worst mother ever. I thought that maybe, once I had my first child, things would come naturally to me.

But I was wrong.

I sat here cradling my pride and joy, waiting for him to wake up. But instead, I let this happen to him. It was all my fault Kaladin was injured like this. If only I were a better mother, maybe this wouldn’t have happened in the first place. If I had just done a better job…

If I were a better mother, I might have the answers. If I had a normal life, then maybe I would know what to say to him when he wakes up. But how could I possibly say anything to him when he has never even called me Mom? I didn’t deserve to have such a handsome and smart son. He looks just like his father with his beautiful black hair. He’s going to break a lot of people’s hearts when he grows up.

Dr. Jacobs had recommended that we love Kaladin with everything we have. But that wasn’t enough. Love wouldn’t help my son’s wounds heal. Love wouldn't mend his conflicted heart. But that’s all I could do.

I just had to try my best and love him with everything I had. And maybe one day, in his eyes, I would be his mother. I wanted nothing more than to be there for him, to be his mother. But I was scared that I couldn’t do it, that my love wouldn’t be enough and Kaladin would drift even further away.

Kaladin stirred and slowly opened his eyes. Our gazes met, and I was at a loss for words. Dr. Jacobs had said something was different about him when he woke up briefly a few days ago. And I didn’t understand it, but something did seem different about him. His beautiful multicolored gemlike eyes seemed so soft as I felt their gaze in my very soul. I couldn’t say anything to him. I just sat there and stroked his long hair.

It’s getting so long now.

My heart ached as he spoke to me softly, “Hi, Mom,” was all he said to me.

The floodgates opened, and I began to cry harder than I ever have. Did he call me Mom? Why now? What did I do to deserve this all of a sudden?

“I’m sorry, Mom. I’m so sorry,” Kaladin looked so hurt. His voice was shaking.

Why was he apologizing to me? This was all my fault?

Kaladin raised himself from the bed and embraced me. I couldn’t even manage words through my ugly sobs as I choked on the air. So I just hugged him in return and continued crying.

“I love you, Mom. I'm so sorry, please stop crying, I’m sorry...” he choked out.

I could feel his tiny body shake as he started crying along with me. I didn’t understand what was going on anymore. Kaladin never cried. Even as an infant, he only cried when he was hungry. Instead of trying to make sense of things, I just continued to embrace my son and cry with him.

He finally called me Mom, and he said he loved me. I love you too, Kaladin. Please forgive me for being the worst mother ever.

—-

Kaladin Shadowheart’s POV

It felt good to tell my mom I loved her finally. I had been repressing these feelings for so long. I felt the weight of years of pent-up emotions leave my body as I cried along with her. I have never cried like this before. And I’ve never seen her cry like this either. I must have worried her so much.

Never again. I would never let my mom cry like this again.

We simply cried ourselves to catharsis. After our little episode, she finally spoke to me, “I’m sorry too, Kal. I haven’t been a very good Mom. Can you forgive me?” she said while wiping away the snot and tears.

What?

This woman has done nothing but support me. I didn’t have a mom in my previous life, but I knew she was trying her best. It was my fault for being like this, causing her so much grief. She felt this way because of me.

Gah, I really am the worst. I don’t deserve this at all.

I hugged her again and told her, “You are the best Mom ever. You didn’t do anything wrong. Please don’t cry…” I begged as tears began to well up in her eyes again.

I didn’t know what she was thinking, but I knew I had to make it right, so I just hugged her tightly again to stop myself from crying.

“How about we just start over, Mom?” I suggested.

It was a good middle ground. I didn’t even deserve this much. But maybe If we could start from square one, I could make amends, and I could really be her son.

She hugged me tighter and spoke softly into my ears, “Okay, let’s do that, but you have to make me a promise,” she said with a goofy smile.

“Yes, anything. I’ll do anything,” I pleaded.

She began to wipe my snot and tears away from my face and smiled down at me. “Just promise you’ll never cry so hard in front of the person you like. You are too handsome to cry like this.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at this. If Mom was willing to joke around now, maybe we could really start over. Hopefully, this could be the start of our relationship as mother and son.

“You should see yourself, mom,” I joked.

It looks like I got this ugly cry from my beautiful mother. She gave me a face of mock surprise and pinched my cheeks as she used to when I was a baby. “That wasn’t very nice,” she pouted while puffing her reddened cheeks.

We both broke out into laughter. My sides hurt from laughing so hard. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed this hard. But I think I can get used to this. It felt way better to embrace these feelings than it did to suppress them.

Just then, my dad opened the door to my room. Dad looked like he had just woken up as his long black hair was disheveled, and he was yawning. “What did I just miss?”

“Good morning, Dad,” I said.

He just stood there confused and moved his hair from his face.

“Uh… yeah… good morning, Son.”

—

It’s been about a month since the events of my birthday. I’ve finally recovered from my injuries and can walk normally again.

I’ve reconciled with both my parents, and things are going well. It seems I can finally be their son, for real this time.

I’ve decided that I wouldn't tell anyone about my past. It would probably only complicate things beyond repair. And frankly, as far as I was concerned, Commander Kronos of Hades Squad had finally died in that jungle. I was no longer the same person I was five years ago.

I finally have these Human emotions that I was robbed of in my previous life. I wanted to truly experience what it was like to live an everyday life and not be somebody’s tool. A lot of these emotions confused me, but I knew one thing for sure, that I was happier than I had ever been.

My family and I were currently eating dinner when my dad asked me an interesting question. “Hey, Kal. Would you like to go to school?”

School? I’ve never been to a school.

I honestly didn't see a reason. I was already getting a top-tier education from Grandpa. Furthermore, going to school would cut into training time with both Dad and Grandpa.

“There is a small school run for kids in the village. Dr. Jacobs recommended that you attend a few days a week there. If you want to, of course,” my mom said.

Huh, even gramps wants me to go to school? It seems my mom is on board with the idea as well. Maybe if I went to school, I would be freeing my mom’s schedule more. She could go back to work full time again. But that was beside the point If my family wanted me to go to school.

I would go to school.

“Okay, I’ll go to school,” I said simply.

With that, it looks like I will be attending my first day of school next week. This should be interesting.